{"id":355,"date":"2015-04-06T16:56:59","date_gmt":"2015-04-06T14:56:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/?p=355"},"modified":"2015-04-07T15:53:31","modified_gmt":"2015-04-07T13:53:31","slug":"han-eller-hon","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/2015\/04\/06\/han-eller-hon\/","title":{"rendered":"Han eller hon?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Fick fr\u00e5gan blir du kallad son eller dotter, flickv\u00e4n eller pojkv\u00e4n, osv? Hur l\u00e4nge har det varit s\u00e5<br \/>\nJag har aldrig brytt mig om det h\u00e4r f\u00f6rns nu faktiskt. Efter min operation och efter att jag p\u00e5b\u00f6rjat mina behandlingar. Dom som k\u00e4nner mig vet vem jag \u00e4r, jag vet vem jag \u00e4r och det \u00e4r det viktigaste! Han eller hon har det varit hela tiden. Ibland har jag tyckt att det \u00e4r jobbigt med hon och ibland med han. Exempel n\u00e4r n\u00e5gon tror eller trott att jag \u00e4r en kille s\u00e5 har jag k\u00e4nt mig pressad till att leva upp till det och inte bli p\u00e5 kommen. Exempel om jag f\u00e5tt den responsen p\u00e5 n\u00e5got tillf\u00e4lligt jobb eller s\u00e5, sv\u00e5rt att f\u00f6rklara. Jag har alltid k\u00e4nt mig mer tryggare n\u00e4r dom omkring mig vet om mig och min &#8221;hemlighet&#8221;. Ibland orkar man inte alltid r\u00e4tta folk heller n\u00e4r dom sagt hon eller han, den fighten v\u00e4ljer man sj\u00e4lv. \u00c4ven om man r\u00e4ttat personerna s\u00e5 har dom iaf inte f\u00f6rst\u00e5tt. Jag har alltid sagt, s\u00e4g vad ni vill eller varf\u00f6r inte s\u00e4ga mitt namn? Jag heter ju Alex. Nu n\u00e4r jag har kommit s\u00e5 h\u00e4r l\u00e5ngt framf\u00f6rallt efter att jag tog bort mina br\u00f6st s\u00e5 har jag vart noga och sagt till alla att nu \u00e4r det HAN som g\u00e4ller och inget annat. Dom accepterar det en del s\u00e4ger du kommer alltid va hon osv. Jag \u00e4r en kille nu och framf\u00f6rallt n\u00e4r jag b\u00f6rjat med testo. Du kan inte st\u00e5 och s\u00e4ga hon l\u00e4ngre, d\u00e5 blir man bara f\u00f6rvirrad n\u00e4r man ser en kille och det blir hon ist\u00e4llet f\u00f6r han. Det finns inget hon l\u00e4ngre. Jag kan f\u00f6rst\u00e5 att det kommer ta tid att v\u00e4nja sig, herregud jag \u00e4r knappt sj\u00e4lv van. Men jag blir s\u00e5 j\u00e4vla glad n\u00e4r jag f\u00e5r mer han nu av dom runt om mig och dom verkligen f\u00f6rst\u00e5r vem jag \u00e4r! Utomst\u00e5ende har alltid och oftast sagt han. Jag har r\u00e4ttat min flickv\u00e4n, mina syskon och min mamma. Du har en son nu, som du alltid vetat ha.. Och precis som hon trode n\u00e4r jag l\u00e5g i hennes mage. K\u00e4rleksguden Eros sa hon alltid. Han finns nu mamma! Till mina systrar s\u00e5 har dom f\u00e5tt en bror, jag \u00e4r eran bror nu! Och min flickv\u00e4n har f\u00e5tt en pojkv\u00e4n som hon alltid haft.. Jag \u00e4r s\u00e5 j\u00e4vla glad att hon vart med mig fr\u00e5n b\u00f6rjan och \u00e4nda hit. Att hon tr\u00e4ffade mig innan min resa. Det va verkligen det jag ville, att hon skulle f\u00e5 l\u00e4ra k\u00e4nna HELA mig.. Jag kommer alltid att ha kvar mina tjejiga sidor och det \u00e4r jag ocks\u00e5 glad \u00f6ver att jag f\u00e5tt chansen och levt det liv som jag gjort. Jag kommer alltid vara jag och ha samma hj\u00e4rta, fast jag kommer se ut mer som den riktiga Alex Det har alltid gjort ont i mig n\u00e4r jag h\u00f6rt folk s\u00e4ga han, om andra personer f\u00f6r jag har ju ocks\u00e5 alltid velat vara han. Varf\u00f6r \u00e4r inte jag han? Varje g\u00e5ng jag h\u00f6rt det ordet s\u00e5 har n\u00e5got slagit i mig. Fr\u00e5n och med nu s\u00e5 lyssnar jag inte p\u00e5 personer som inte accepterat min vilja och det jag framf\u00f6rt till dom. Det \u00e4r okej att dom kan s\u00e4ga hon ibland, det tar tid. Men sn\u00e4lla s\u00e4g inte hon inf\u00f6r nya m\u00e4nniskor f\u00f6r dom ser bara en kille. Det blir s\u00e5 j\u00e4vla fel! Jag lever mitt liv nu som han och det \u00e4r det jag kommer att bli ocks\u00e5. Jag vill bara vara mig sj\u00e4lv och ingen annan!<\/p>\n<p>HE OR SHE?<br \/>\nGot the question, are you called son or daughter, girlfriend or boyfriend? How long has it been sence?<br \/>\nI have never bothered me about this until now actually. After my surgery and after I started my treatments. Those who know me and knows who I am.. And that I know who I am that&#8217;s the main thing! He or she has been constantly. Sometimes I have thought that it is a hassle with her and sometimes he. Example, when someone thinks or thought that I&#8217;m a guy so I have felt pressured to live up to it and not be exposed. Example if I got the response to a temporary job or so, i&#8217;ts hard to explain. I have always felt more secure when they around me know about me and my &#8221;secret&#8221;. Sometimes you don&#8217;t always feel to right people even when they said she, or he, that fight you choose yourself. Even if informed people sometimes they have not understood anyway. I&#8217;ve always said, say what you want or why not say my name? I called the Alex. Now that I&#8217;ve come this far especially after my top s, I&#8217;ve been very clear and told everyone that now you only say HE and nothing else. They accept what some say you will always be she and so on. I&#8217;m a guy now and especially when I started with T. You can&#8217;t go around and say her or she anymore, then people will just become confused when they see a guy. There is no she anymore. I can understand that it will take time to get used to, my God, I am hardly self-van. But I get so fucking happy when I get the more he of them around me and they really understand who I am! Outsiders have always and usually said he. I have corrected my girlfriend, my siblings and my mother. You have a son now, as you have always known.. And just like she said when I was in her stomach. God of love Eros she always said. He is here now mother! For my sisters so they&#8217;ve got a brother, I&#8217;m your brother now! And my girlfriend has got a boyfriend whom she always had.. I&#8217;m so damn glad that she spent all the time with me from the beginning and all the way here. That she met me before my trip. Thats really what I wanted, that she would get to know all of me .. I will always keep my girly sides and I am also glad that I got the chance and lived the life that I have. I will always be me and have the same heart, though I will look more like the real Alex. I have always felt pain in me when I heard people say he, of other people because I&#8217;ve also always wanted to be a &#8221;he&#8221;. Why am I not a he? Every time I heard that word something has struck me. From now on I do not listen to people who don&#8217;t accept my will and what I conveyed to them. It&#8217;s okay that they can say she sometimes, it takes time. But please do not say she infront of new people they just see a guy. It gets so fucking wrong! I live my life now as a he and that is what I will become too. I just want to be myself and no one else!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Fick fr\u00e5gan blir du kallad son eller dotter, flickv\u00e4n eller pojkv\u00e4n, osv? Hur l\u00e4nge har det varit s\u00e5 Jag har aldrig brytt mig om det h\u00e4r f\u00f6rns nu faktiskt. Efter min operation och efter att jag p\u00e5b\u00f6rjat mina behandlingar. Dom som k\u00e4nner mig vet vem jag \u00e4r, jag vet vem jag \u00e4r och det \u00e4r &#8230; <a title=\"Han eller hon?\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/2015\/04\/06\/han-eller-hon\/\" aria-label=\"L\u00e4s mer om Han eller hon?\">L\u00e4s mer<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11151,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-355","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-my-transition"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/355","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11151"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=355"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/355\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=355"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=355"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogg.improveme.se\/finnsbara1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=355"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}